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The One About Consent

An interesting happened recently, a person from my past found the porn that Stefano and I make online. This person, who we'll simple call Asshat (because that's how Stefano and I refer to him), contacted me out of the blue (when they had been asked to NEVER contact me again no less).

Asshat emailed me what was obviously a message of disappointment under the guise of concern. Fortunately, I no longer allow people to play mind games with me so I saw through their nonsense and refused to play along.

But that email implied that I was somehow unhappy making porn with my husband and that somehow maybe I was being forced into making porn. If you've watched any of my porn you can see that Stefano and I love what we do. Our love and enjoyment of fucking comes through loud and clear in pretty much every video we make. Not only are we both consenting adults, but I was actually the one who suggested we get into make porn in the first place!

All of this got me thinking about consent in general and how messed up consent is in a world of #MeToo movements and shitty guys in positions of power (or otherwise) that take advantage of women (Asshat falls into that category). If you're going to have sex with anyone you need consent. Period. End of story. This isn't something you get while sliding yourself into someone. This isn't something you get after several drinks or while on drugs. This is something you need to get from a sober and mentally stable adult. Every. Single. Time.

What some people don't seem to get is that this applies to porn in the same way. When you're having sex with someone you should make sure that every sex "act" you want to try is okay with your partner. This means it's not okay to just cum on a girl without her approval. This means you don't get to poke her in the butt with a finger, dick, toy, or anything else unless she's okay with it (if she agrees then read Anal 101 first). This means that if you're lucky enough to get a blowjob from someone that you don't force yourself down her throat (again, unless she's into that and you have her consent).

What should be common sense seems like it is anything but these days. This all even applies to sending dick and butthole pictures of yourself to random girls as I've covered in detail here. Don't assume because you're nailing a so called "porn star" that suddenly the rules don't apply.

Always discuss what sex acts you are both wanting to do and make sure everyone is on the same page before you start. I get it, this isn't always a sexy or romantic option when you have a new partner you're getting to know sexually. But it's much more of a turn on to be with a guy who is asking for consent then to be with one who just does whatever he wants. This is one of those areas in life where asking for forgiveness later is NOT an option.

A lot of women grow up thinking that having men push sexual boundaries (or worse) is normal and that simply isn't the case. On the flip side, some of us who have amazing and thoughtful partners like Stefano often forget how shitty so many guys are and we don't realize how many people are being pushed into sex acts they otherwise didn't want to do. So I just wanted to write this and get this info out there. It applies to everyone even though I'm clearly targeting guys with this one. If you want to be a good guy and get the good girl then skip the mind games, always get consent, and be a fucking gentleman at all times!

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